A small game with my oldest child—my son—and a way of reaching first.
This is a personal account of where the song began. It does not define what the song must mean.
Finding a reason to hold you
My children express affection differently. My second child, my daughter, comes close easily. My oldest child, my son, does not often reach for me first, at least not in the same way.
I cannot know exactly what my child is thinking. I only know that I worry about whether the love I feel is always the love my child can recognize.
The ceiling game
So I make up a reason for closeness. I ask my child to come over and try to touch the ceiling. I lift the child up, and for a moment we have an ordinary game with no need to explain what I am doing.
The game matters because it lets me reach first. I do not have to wait for my child to ask for an embrace before I offer one.
Why the lyrics leave room
The song does not state that my oldest feels unloved or believes I love another child more. Those are fears I have, not facts about my child’s inner life.
The ceiling is a simple, physical image. Behind it is the question of how to show someone that they are wanted when they do not ask in the way we expect.
What the song adds to the album
One day my child will be too big for me to lift this way. The game, like so many others, will disappear even if the relationship continues.
For now, I can reach first, while my arms still can.
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